Thursday, November 11, 2010

FATQs (Frequently Asked Twin Questions)

As a mom of twins, I get asked a TON of questions. Some of them are understandable, and some are just downright weird. Since I seem to get a lot of the same questions repeatedly, I thought I'd post the answers here so you can know a little more about what it's like to have twins. Those of you who always thought growing up that it would be fun to have careful what you wish for! :)

Do they wake each other up when they cry?

If both babies are asleep, they usually do not wake each other up. The only time they even seem to hear each other crying is when one is almost asleep and the other starts to cry. The one who was almost out wakes up scared, and then I have two crying babies. Awesome.

Do they sleep in the same crib?

No. Some twin moms do put both babies in the same crib, but we never have. Cole came home from the NICU about 2 weeks before Ellen, so he had already been sleeping in his bed. We noticed that he seemed to move around a lot, so when Ellen came home we just put her in her bed. Now, most nights Cole sleeps in the swing (this is about to change) and Ellen sleeps in her bed.

Do you carry them at the same time?

Yes, sometimes I do. Most of the time, though, I just take them one at a time to change their diaper or whatever needs to be done. The other one is usually freaking out in the den while waiting their turn.

How do you do it????

I don't know...I just do. It is what it is. I don't know anything else. I have only had two babies. They need to be fed and changed, so I do it. Don't get me wrong, it was super hard in the beginning. The lack of sleep is a killer. But since they've been sleeping better, life is much, much easier.

What's the hardest part about having twins?

There are several things that I think would be easier with just one child. First, when one baby goes to sleep, Mom gets a break. However, in my world after one baby goes to sleep, I still have to wait for the other to go to sleep. Sometimes Ellen will fall asleep easily. Cole will finally go down after some persuasion, and then Ellen will wake up right after I put Cole down. The advice to "sleep when the baby sleeps" doesn't always work in my world. Some days in the beginning there was always someone awake. Not cool.

Play time and cuddle time are both difficult because I have both Ellen and Cole to think about. When I'm playing just with Ellen, I feel like I'm neglecting Cole and vice versa. Some days one of them is feeling more social than the other and therefore gets more attention. I try not to worry too much each day about who is getting more attention because I think it all evens out over time.

Waking sleeping babies. At least once a day I have to wake a sleeping baby. I know it has to be done, but that doesn't make it easier. If Cole wakes up hungry, I have to get Ellen up to eat too or they'll be on different schedules. If you ask twin moms what one piece of advice they would give to new twin moms they would almost all say to keep both babies on the same schedule. Before they started sleeping through the night, this was the hardest thing to do. I kept wondering if Ellen would sleep through the night if Cole hadn't gotten up to eat. Or if Cole would've taken a longer nap if Ellen had stayed asleep. Now it's better since they're not eating in the middle of the night anymore, but still not fun.

What's the best part of having twins?

Twins really are fun. And I've heard they get more fun as they get older. I love seeing their two distinct personalities every day. I can't imagine only getting to experience this with one of them. Part of the fun is seeing how different they are. They are just starting to sort of see each other. They have only looked each other in the eye a couple of times, but it was pretty funny. They both looked really serious as they stared at each other. I can't wait until they smile and laugh together.

And having two makes for some pretty funny days. One day after they had eaten Ellen sneezed. It scared Cole so he started to whine and cry, and Ellen laughed at him. Hilarious. And yesterday Cole started chewing on Ellen's arm since it was on his face while she was eating. Then they sneezed at exactly the same time. I would miss out on stuff like this with only one baby.

I know the challenges of having twins may seem harder in the future (Two crawlers?! Two walkers?!!), but I also know that the joys of having twins will multiply too.


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LOL great post! I have to say i wondered about all of those things too! I am really enjoying reading about all your adventures!